Well.. I didn't get that damn gold star like I was hoping. Very close...maybe Thursday. I swear that I always have a headache. It blows. What else. WW going good this week...well today at least. There was no cheating.. I worked today. I have like this love hate relationship with my job. I love it cause its fun to get out of the house, I love to work with my bestie...and etc. I hate it cause workplaces tend to have a "political agenda" if you know what I mean. I'm not talking about presidential elections and junk like that. I'm talking about crappy side work all the time pretty much...and arguments over soup cups and stupid stuff like that. I hate crappy tips. People you tip at least 15%. That is the minimum. Tonight I had some old man leave 10 bucks on 119 buck ticket. If your to cheap or old to leave a decent tip...then stay home...really do me a favor.
I left with 35.00 in my pocket. Over it, but is it really worth the hassle? I went to see "bride wars" with my bff after work. It was really cute and the perfect movie to go to with my best friend. I didn't see my husband today. sad. Sometimes you have to sacrifice the goose for the gander..whatever the hell that means. Then I drove home and cried a little...sometimes life just sucks. These are the times I suppose. I would love to say that I am over my current situation..I try and pretend I am, but truth is I'm not. How do you just get over financial ruin? and most of all....everything that comes with that. You don't right away...its a lame process that goes on for months and months and will take till the end of the year to figure out I'm sure.. Its a process that leaves me feeling void of hope or faith. It makes me want to crawl in a hole and not socialize or go to church cause usually those things just bring a little more heartache in some way or another. I know the church is true, and I have a testimony...I think sometimes people fall away a little simply cause life is just a little to much. I don't expect that Heavenly Father will show up in a white chariot and rescue me from my misery and sadness, I know thats not really the way it works.. I know I have to choose to exercise faith and what not.. But right now I just need a little break from all that... all that trying to have hope and bs. I wanna just wallow for a bit. I want to stay away....cause I'm tired of putting on a show.
